Improving Family Relationships through Communication and Forgiveness

Families Can Be Together Forever

I recently had a crucial conversation with my Mother. It started out with her just checking in on me to see how I was doing, her knowing I’d just received my second dose of vaccination for COVID 19, in my line of work.

After we’d finished discussing this topic, she asked me if there was anything else I wanted to say to her. At first, I hesitated inside, but in this case, my heart and spirit won out, and I carefully and bravely began to share some things I’ve had issues with family members for many years.

I went on to express and share openly, telling her how I felt. She listened, and when I was done, she spoke, and I listened. Together we were able to learn from each other, and see more of the picture of the puzzle to these painful and unsolved matters.

As we spoke truth in love one to another, as illuminated by honesty and the guidance of the Holy Spirit, the very real and impassible barriers of emotional and mental turmoil were opened, and I could finally begin to choose my pathway home, of healed and repaired relationships.

My spiritually relatable thoughts on this are as follows:

Relationships are based on love, love is built on trust, and trust is built on communication. If we stop communicating, we stop trusting, and thus loving.

Being away from someone to get some space to learn and grow is fine. In fact, this is the best choice in many cases. However, in the Lord’s good timing, a window will be opened, and the Spirit will direct when it’s good, and how to reach out to make amends and forgive. Many times, people who’ve really been hurt, close off their hearts to protect themselves from getting hurt again. While this serves its purposes, there also comes a time when strength in vulnerability has a place.

Life is so precious. So are relationships and salvation. They go hand in hand. We need each other. Don’t let pride, fear, jealously, past fights, selfishness, arguments or anything else win the war over you and your family line, both past, present or future. Your division effects not only you and your individual disputes. They effect both before and beyond, and sadly, into the eternities, where it will be harder to resolve such tragedies. Trust me, you will want to be more proactive in your building of family ties, if you knew what you’d be losing, and the glories you could’ve gained and enjoyed.

Shane

The Tyler Wilkinson Vision

Be Mindful of What You Ask For

There was a time in my life, when I had been tried on different medications, none of which had worked. I had been unstable, and piled upon with much abuse, torment and emotional and mental strain. Even having experienced ritualistic abuse, and an injection of a poisonous drug, which gave me the severest of mental illnesses, and also brain damage. Even such, that I had unspeakable mental and emotional baggage, and all around life damage, that only God could undo and correct, and over a much longer period of time in my life.

One night however, while I was still fresh in the beginning of my recovery, having finally been tried on a new medication that actually started to work, I had been watching an inspirational video on tape (VHS). This video portrayed a young man who in high school back in the ‘80’s, had been a phenomenal athlete.

He was and is a Latter-Day Saint, and starred in baseball, wrestling and football. He had many great things going for him, including scholarships, which he was very excited about, and was planning on utilizing, and marrying his high school sweetheart. One night, when he was driving to see her at her dance competition, he was very tired, and fell asleep at the wheel. When he came upon an oncoming semi-truck, Tyler over-corrected his vehicle, and crashed in an accident with this semi.

Tyler was left a survivor, and a quadriplegic. Instead of letting his new life take him and his ambitions down, and love for excelling in life, he did not relent, but became and did other things, which surpassed many others in a similar predicament.

He pushed and pushed himself into and throughout his recovery and rehabilitation, in very rigorous and devoted ways. He wanted the blessings!

After watching this video of him, entitled, Tyler, A Real Hero, narrated by Steve Young, I was powerfully moved upon. It was later in that same evening, while walking through the living room area of my parent’s home in California, that I said into the wide expanse above, “Tyler, I want to meet you.”

Later that night, I then said my prayers, and went to bed. Then, in my disheveled dreams, I was among the unhealthy individuals I associated with, in my not-too-distant past, playing football with them. Then, Tyler appeared there, and he was on my team. He was with me, giving me confidence and advice, and soon we conquered and walked away from the game.

I found myself in the living room with him, where he was standing in the very place I had cried out my heart’s desire to meet him.

He began to talk with me. “So, I understand that you are going through a hard time right now.” he said.

And then he told me how he had also been through some very difficult things. He exhorted me to start going forward again, and that things which were holding me back for so long were gone. He advised me to make good of my situation.

I began complaining saying, “But you don’t know what I’ve been through, what it’s like. You can’t possibly understand.”

“Yeah, maybe,” he stated, “but you can still do as I’ve done, and overcome.”

Then I continued complaining to him, saying, how hard it was, and that he had no idea. I then said, “This isn’t real, how is this even possible anyway!? You’re alive somewhere else, and I’m here!”

He then said, “We have our ways.”

To which I said, I can’t do this, and you can’t help me!”

To which he replied, “Then why did you ask me here?”

And he was slowly gone…

I then walked over to the family stereo, touched it, and inspected it, then looked around, and went back to my bedroom, got under my blankets, and went to sleep.

Shane

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